Girls!!!! You know I love you and I tell it as it is. Truth is hard but if we allow it to penetrate our hearts then we get closer to healing and who doesn’t want to be whole? 🙂 🙂
You meet this guy and he seems just great! He calls you one day and the conversation goes well. He does not ask you out for a date like you dreamed but he is sweet and has good manners. If you are a God girl like me, you are also impressed by just how he adores God. You become friends and talk once in a while. It is not often enough to be sure that something is growing but also not rare enough to be sure that it is nothing!! Hahaha! So close yet so very far! Intangible!The craziness of the single life!! 😀
I have learned that the above is ok and normal but the trouble starts here… You are really ready for a relationship so you are always thinking ahead. You are already praying about what God thinks of him, you are already wondering if it could work and if you are super fast, you are already thinking what kind of dad he would make!! LOL!! Girls you know it’s true! The problem with allowing your thoughts to go this far is that you set yourself up for hurt. You grow fond of him even before you are sure he likes you back. You start to whatsapp him with every thought and juicy detail of your day. Soon he is the first person you talk to in the morning and the last one at night. Remember though that he has not made anything clear. He has not told you if he feels anything for you.
Truth is I do not understand why the guys reply and keep you engaged in conversations if they feel nothing for you but bottom line is they do. Maybe they are just a really polite gender!! lol!! I teach my baby brother and my close male friends not to do that but the problem persists with most other guys. I know guys are also reading this so please guys, girls just love conversation. It might be a universal love language for all females. To call often and ask them how they are doing, to chat often on whatsapp and any other constant communication sends a signal to them that you might not be necessarily intending. So please stop!! I know it sounds drastic but please stop! Call, chat and give attention to the girl you see a future with. Pursue her intentionally and avoid all these misunderstandings…. Believe me, one day you will be dealing with a guy doing this to your daughter and it won’t be pretty!
Back to my girls, we cannot really control what guys do but we can take control of our own lives and hearts. Guard your heart. Have some dignity. Love yourself. Let him look for you. Let him chase, they actually do enjoy it. Let him be the man. Do not pour your whole heart out to him even before he tells you what he wants. Do not be one of the many girls he chats the whole day with. Do not allow yourself to get carried away in your thoughts. My sister and I have this rule, ‘He does not like you until he says it’. Believe me, it is a good rule! No guessing! It has saved me from a lot of unnecessary heart ache. This post was birthed this morning when I woke up with this urge to narrate a story to my “so close yet so far” but I have managed not to. I will not. Guy got to earn my stories 😀 Guy got to truly want my stories. Guy got to set the ball rolling. I will call up my girlfriend and share my story much as it’s not the same! It will do for now! 🙂 🙂
Strong, girls!! Strong!!