Don’t Judge Me

I am afraid that I have been played!!! Played by society! Played by my friends!! Played! Played! Played! I have simply been had!! And you know what? You have probably been had too. How? You ask. Let me try to explain…

I used to be very vocal about sexual purity in the church. “Sex in the Temple”!! I used to encourage myself and everyone I could, to keep ourselves pure until marriage. This is until many friends of mine and youth from church and many fellowships I belong to became pregnant outside of the marriage bed. I felt hurt, confused and cheated. I thought we were on the same path, struggling to wait until we got married. I was given the “don’t judge people look” when I got shocked to learn that my fellow worship leader or prayer partner was pregnant. I marveled at everyone saying congratulations and no one asking what happened. Slowly I stopped talking about purity and started to be “more understanding”. I told myself that salvation is personal, so my agreement with God is what mattered. I was even more shocked to find out only last week that I was beginning to think that maybe it is not possible to wait until marriage.

All this is until a few weeks ago when I met one Eva Kemunto Mageto for dinner. She took me through her journey with her man and the purity that they have held on to through the Grace of God, and you know what? I feel like I was resurrected!! They reminded me that it DOES MATTER to God. Purity is actually at the core of his heart! He has spoken endlessly in His word about his expectations of His children in regards to sex before marriage and keeping the marriage bed undefiled in marriage. He has an opinion and a clear one!! All these reminders have produced a new reverence for Him and the subject at hand.

It is not my place to judge! I have not and will not do that!! However, I will expect my born again friends and more so myself to wait until marriage. I will therefore unashamedly continue to get shocked when a baby appears and we were praying together and sharing a month ago. Forgive me if the congratulations is not easily forthcoming. It is nothing personal! It’s just me trying to figure out where we lost our own. Me crying within, wondering where my friend is with God. Have you guys(my friend and God) talked about what happened? 

I will continue to show love to my friends who have sex and beautiful babies outside of the marriage bed because God loves them more than anything in the world!! However, I will not be ashamed to or shy away from celebrating PURITY!! It is beautiful, it is honorable in God’s sight and it is possible!!!!! woohooo!!! 

This week I celebrate Eva and her man. On friday I will attend the wedding and dance like a crazy woman in celebration of what God can do if we allow Him to work in us!! Thank you Lord for the resurrection!

I am encouraged and humbled!!

Love,

Ndanu

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